6 Mistakes Men Make When Giving Her Oral Sex
2025-01-03
How Deep is the Vagina? Probably not as big as you think!
2025-01-076 G-Spot Myths Women Wish Men Would Stop Believing
2025-01-04
Artwork: © Carlyn Beccia | www.CarlynBeccia.com
Table of Contents
1. Myth #1: The G-spot was named by Dr. Ernst Gräfenberg2. Myth #2: The G-spot is a spot
3. Myth #3: Women don't have a prostate
4. Myth #4: The G-spot causes female ejaculate or squirting, and they are the same
5. Myth #5: To stimulate the G-spot, make a come hither stroking motion with your finger
6. Myth 6: The G-spot cannot be stimulated through penetrative sex
Source from: Carlyn Beccia's medium Post
Misunderstanding female anatomy is why squirting is confused with female ejaculation.
No other part of the female anatomy has been discovered, denounced, rediscovered, renamed, and frustrated researchers more than the elusive G-spot. It's been called Gräfenberg's Holy Grail of female pleasure, a magical sex "button," and the secret orgasmic key to unlocking ecstasy. But as any vulva owner can tell you, the reality isn't squirting unicorns.
Despite this, plenty of myths and misconceptions surround the G-spot, particularly regarding ejaculation vs. squirting.
So, as always, let's debunk a few anatomy myths with the latest research.
Myth #1: The G-spot was named by Dr. Ernst Gräfenberg
History is filled with male anatomists going all Christopher Columbus on women's bits. The Fallopian Tubes, Bartholin's glands, the Pouch of Douglas, the Graffian Follicle, the Skene's Glands, and the Glands of Montgomery are all named after male anatomists. But most of these scientists didn't name women's sex and reproductive organs after themselves. Later men gave them that honor.
For example, when Gabriele Fallopio discovered the fallopian tubes in the sixteenth century, he called them "tuba uteri" because he thought they looked like a trumpet. Later, the medical community honored Fallopio by renaming the tuba uteri the "fallopian tubes."
In the nineteenth century, Scottish physician and researcher Alexander Johnston Chalmers Skene identified the paraurethral glands — the glands responsible for female ejaculation. These were later renamed the Skene's glands to honor his groundbreaking work.
Then there is the G-spot — named after Ernst Gräfenberg.
In 1950, Ernst Gräfenberg described an erogenous region located a few inches up the anterior wall of the vagina between 11:00 and 1:00. Dr. Gräfenberg noted that stimulating the area caused it to swell and sometimes emit a milky fluid.
Three decades later, Dr. Beverly Whipple, Dr. Frank Addiego, and other researchers took up the mantle and revisited Dr. Gräfenberg's research. Dr. Whipple's confirmed an erogenous zone that could cause female ejaculation.
To honor her research, her colleagues suggested she name this pleasure zone the "Whipple Tickle."
That's one way to get a female researcher to demur.
Instead, Dr. Whipple named this region the "G-spot" in honor of Dr. Gräfenberg's earlier work.
Dr. Whipple probably didn't want her name attached to the area for another reason. Her intentions were never for scientists to debate whether the "spot" existed while generations of women frantically searched for whether they had a G-spot.
This brings us to our next myth…
Myth #2: The G-spot is a spot
In 2017, scientists went on a spelunking adventure to find the G-spot on 13 female cadavers. Unfortunately, they did not find it for one reason — the G-spot is not an anatomical structure, "spot," or organ.
According to a recent 2022 editorial in Sexual Medicine Reviews, the G-spot is not a single entity but a complex network of tissues and nerves throughout the clitoral network. Consequently, researchers have suggested calling these areas "zones" instead of spots.
These erogenous zones include the clitoral crura, the clitoral bulbs, the Skene's glands (or female prostate), the urethra, and the anterior vaginal wall periurethral glands.
Here is a handy map of the erogenous zones.
Artwork: © Carlyn Beccia | www.CarlynBeccia.com
Still, some sexologists insist on slicing up the clitoral network with the A-spot, C-spot, E-spot, and G-spot. (I might be missing some letters.) Since pleasure doesn't emanate from one "spot," we don't need to play alphabet soup with women's genitalia.
For example, the G-spot is part of the clitoral network or what some researchers call the Clitourethrovaginal (CUV) Complex — the distribution of nerves and tissues, including the clitoris, urethra, and anterior vaginal wall.
Better yet, think of it this way. We don't refer to the frenulum — the sensitive area on the underside of the penis head — as the F-spot or the penis shaft as the S-spot. Can the clitoris please get the same respect?
Myth #3: Women don't have a prostate
It only took centuries of dissecting female cadavers, but the medical community has finally admitted that women have a prostate. Unfortunately, some researchers are still refusing to call it a prostate.
Part of the problem is that no one can agree on which bits make up the female prostate. Currently, the female prostate is defined as the urethral sponge and Skene's glands (paraurethral glands) —two small ducts on either side of the urethra. (See illustration below).
The Skene’s glands emit a milky white fluid that helps lubricate the vagina and protects it from infection.
Artwork: © Carlyn Beccia | www.CarlynBeccia.com
The Skene's glands are homologous to a man's prostate glands. As discussed earlier, homologous parts share the same relation, relative position, or structure.
So if the Skene's and prostate glands are homologous, why are they not named the same? If only the medical community could find another dead male anatomist to name the female prostate after, this wouldn't be a problem.
Myth #4: The G-spot causes female ejaculate or squirting, and they are the same
Whenever I explain the difference between female ejaculation and squirting, the comment section turns into a gaslighting frenzy. Well, cool the tar because a recent study settles the debate and reiterates an earlier study that found they were "completely different phenomena."
This recent study only had five participants, but it used a pretty visual method to differentiate squirting vs. female ejaculation. The researchers had participants empty their bladder, and then they inserted a urethral catheter. Then they injected participants with a blue dye to track the fluid.
The next part is why sex researchers often struggle to get funding. To squirt or ejaculate, the ladies sexually stimulated themselves while the researchers videotaped. (Sorry, some people have more exciting jobs.)
The results were as clear as the blue dye. Researchers found female ejaculate comes from the Skene's glands or female prostate (see Myth #3.) It has similar components to male ejaculate — prostate-specific antigen and fructose, but obviously, no sperm.
Squirting, on the other hand, comes from the urinary bladder and comprises urea, creatinine, and uric acid. It also contains prostate-specific antigens, but in lesser amounts than female ejaculate.
To confuse matters more, squirting and female ejaculation can co-occur.
So how do you tell the difference? Well, that's like the difference between a Frappuccino and a cappuccino. They both will give you a buzz, but one has more sexy branding. The one with the sexy branding — squirting — is what you see in most porn videos. The dramatic gush of clear fluid is hard to miss, while female ejaculate is about a teaspoon of white, milky fluid. Not nearly as cinematic.
Either way, can we please focus on her orgasm instead of whether she is peeing on you? Asking for a friend.
Myth #5: To stimulate the G-spot, make a come hither stroking motion with your finger
The G-spot's primary erogenous zone in most women (not all) is the urethral sponge which has a distinctive texture of ridges, bumps, and grooves surrounded by smooth, tight tissue. Think of it as feeling a wrinkled raisin surrounded by smooth grapes.
To stimulate this area, most sexologists recommend you insert a finger into her vagina with the palm up and then make a come hither motion.
Yeah, sorry, you are not beckoning a Labrador Retriever. Unfortunately, the come hither technique is not that simple.
First, I suspect many women don't like the G-spot stimulated because their partner does not start slowly. So start with one finger while gradually increasing the pressure.
The next problem is technique. Remember that this "spot" is a bit of a diva. The Skene's glands do not have receptors for touch stimulation. So unlike other erogenous zones that respond to light caresses, this area responds more to pressure than to touch.
In fact, the G-spot is so sensitive to pressure that you can even stimulate it from the outside by pressing on the top of the pubic bone below the navel while inserting a finger, toy, or penis.
Artwork: © Carlyn Beccia | www.CarlynBeccia.com
This pressure creates a sort of pleasure panini sandwich. Think of the top sandwich bread as the downward pressure on the pubic bone and the bottom bread as the upward pressure inside her vaginal canal. Meanwhile, the salami is the erogenous zone getting smushed together. (Sorry for all the food references. It's lunchtime, and I am hungry.)
Another snafu with G-spot stimulation is the cervix. The cervix is anywhere from 3 to 6 inches inside the vaginal canal. If you put your finger in too deep, you may hit the cervix. Some women like their cervix stimulated. Others will want to punch you in the face.
Myth 6: The G-spot cannot be stimulated through penetrative sex
Most of my readers don't need to be lectured on how to bring a woman to orgasm. You already know that five minutes of sweaty thrusting without direct clitoral stimulation will not cut it. (By "direct" stimulation, I mean the external portions of the clitoris and not the internal portions surrounding the vaginal canal. See clitoris illustration.)
But lately, I keep reading that fingers are the best way to stimulate the G-spot. On the contrary, the penis is perfectly designed to hit that zone.
The confusion partly arose out of outdated anatomy books which illustrate coitus with the penis entering straight into the vagina. This is not how intercourse works. Let's just say there is a reason homo Sapien's penis bends — her pleasure.
Artwork: © Carlyn Beccia | www.CarlynBeccia.com
The penis makes a boomerang shape once inside the vaginal canal, allowing your partner to hit different areas depending on their position. (For non-hetero couples, try an angled toy or dildo designed to hit the area.)
One way penis owners can hit the G-spot is with the Coital Alignment Technique (CAT) — a variation of the classic missionary position that researchers found results in more female orgasms. With this position, the penetrating partner is on top, but they shift their body up and forward to align their chest with the bottom person's shoulders. (Tip: Try a wedge or pillow under the bottom partner.)
Hide the kids. This needs a more graphic illustration…
Artwork: © Carlyn Beccia | www.CarlynBeccia.com
Then instead of thrusting in and out, both partners rock their hips in a grinding motion. (Incidentally, this is why it is called "grinding the corn.”) The takeaway is to focus on pressure, NOT thrusting in and out. You are grinding corn, not shucking it.
I hope this latest research clears up some of the G-spot myths. Unfortunately, we still need to learn more about the G-spot, G-zone, pleasure panini, or whatever you want to call it.
11 Oysters highly appreciate Carlyn Beccia's exploration of sexual techniques and thank her for sharing this valuable information. This article is based on Carlyn Beccia's medium post, “6 G-Spot Myths Women Wish Men Would Stop Believing”.
